If oranges = insurance policies

If buying an orange was like working with insurance companies, here’s what it would look like:

Joe’s Market advertises The Cheapest Oranges in town.

You go to Joe’s to buy oranges.

Joe asks you some questions, like:

  • why do you want these oranges?
  • how long have you bought oranges from Frank’s before coming to Joe’s?
  • how do you plan to peel the oranges?
  • how clean is your kitchen?
  • will anyone juggle with the oranges?
  • will the oranges be refrigerated, or left in a bowl on the counter?
  • can you give me a sample of earlier orange juice you made?

After you answer, Joe takes one week to think about it, then gets back to you with his offer:

  • you can buy 2 oranges but you can only buy the smaller ones
  • I’ll let you buy the oranges if you promise your son won’t eat one
  • the oranges will be sweet, but only if used for the following recipes
  • the oranges cost $1, but I won’t tell you why and tomorrow they may be $2
  • there’s a chance that after you buy the orange I’ll change the price and send you a bill
  • forgot to tell you earlier, but if you also want to buy an apple here, I won’t let you
  • I’ll mail you a 50-page receipt and 4 pieces of mail over the next 2 weeks
  • Go online to pay, and good luck deciphering the payment options
  • Please don’t call us ever again

I know how insurance companies stay afloat, and I support their efforts to underwrite in order to provide anyone with any financial protection at all.  I get it.  But what I do NOT understand is that they’ve yet to reduce the cumbersome, often not intuitive, frequently not transparent, and seemingly arrogant manner in which they create roadblocks to a more favorable experience in an area that is so important to families.

We believe it’s our calling to sit between insurance companies and families because insurance companies don’t teach, they don’t advocate, they don’t make things smooth, they don’t show appreciation, they don’t come talk to you at your house about what matters to you, they often don’t call you back, they follow rules and manuals, and they act like they’re in it for themselves.  They are not stewards.

Photo: Siena, Italy

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